Babies and children are inspiring.
I have been living in Israel for nearly two years and I know about 40 words in hebrew. I know it's pathetic. I had a place at a language school but my son was born early and I could not go. Time passed and my son was very attached to me and I was very attached to him. He would not stay with anyone else and I do not think I was ready to leave him with anyone. Look, things would have been different if my parents lived here or my in-laws but I don't have close family here so it is hard, you know? Anyway I did a very intensive langauge course with a friend of mine who is a hebrew teacher. And it was great but it was so hard. I think I complained a lot. I just felt like it took me 10 hours to remember one word and you feel like a complete idiot. It takes me about 5 minutes to say a basic, very easy sentence in Hebrew and when I try to read anything it takes me forever and a day that I just want to give up. And as I have not been on top of it for the last few weeks I feel like I have forgotten everything again and that I will have to start at the beginning. And it is not just a new language, it is everything. If you want to learn anything new it will feel like it takes forever. I never learnt a music instrument because I was too lazy to practice and I just wanted to be able to play it without working for it. I am certain that a lot of people are not like me but still. How does one learn to be patient with one self?
Babies and children are inspiring and they should inspire us because they are so patient with themselves. Or maybe they do not know how not to be patient. But no.. because one can see that they too get frustrated sometimes but they will still try again and often they will try even harder.
I see it every day with my son. He was been walking around furniture for 7 months and two weeks ago he started walking on his own and he is still falling on his bum every four steps and he just gets up and starts again. Isn't that amazing and he is like that with everything. He has to learn everything new and if it takes him a hundert tries he will try until he succeeds. At the moment I am trying to teach him that his eyes are his eyes. But he does not get it. He knows his head, tummy, feet, ears and his pippiman. Yes that is what we call it. I did not like willy and penis just sounds so weird. I am not a doctor why should I call it that. And somehow pippiman sounds like a superhero, like superman or batman. I am hoping it will help him have a good relationship to his pippiman- you might ask why I am worried it about it. Well I think if everyone was obsessed with your pippiman during your childhood you would have a difficult relationship to your pippiman or actually pippiwoman as I am not talking to men only. My son had a problem since he was created, he had problems weeing and he needed to be born early and have an operation. And for the next years he is going to have to visit his urologist religiously. So yes I am worried he is going to have a difficult relationship to his pippiman. Why did I start talking about that? Oh yes because he does not know his eyes, nose or mouth. And I have been trying to teach him every day and he is just not getting it.
So now I don't just have to be patient with myself when it comes to learning something new but also with my son. But somehow it is easier and I am hoping that it will teach me to be more patient with myself and also to be kinder to myself. Children are amazing that's all I can say, that is all that needs to be said, don't you think?
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